May 2008 Archives
I've just recently become aware that I have this neurosis about wanting to do things in the proper order, and I think it extends to many aspects of my life. What ends up happening is that if I get stuck and can't (or don't) accomplish one thing, I just don't move forward to the next thing and I end up in limbo for who knows how long. It occurs to me that, for a supposedly creative person, I'm apparently pretty linear.
It sounds like a strange reason, but this is really why I haven't updated this site in so long. I wanted to post dazzling photos and stories of my trip to Ireland. But I've only uploaded one day's worth of photos to Flickr. Other things keep coming up and I keep telling myself once I finally get around to those photos, I'll post something. After a while, I just sound like I'm making excuses, and that's something I'm growing to dislike doing even more than I dislike doing things in the wrong order.
So I've finally come to the conclusion that I have to learn to break out of this kind of thinking because it makes me feel stuck and it often prevents me from accomplishing things (again, I'm referring to many more important things in my life than whether or not I update this site).
So, now's as good a time as any. I'm currently sitting in a hotel that's way too uppity for me, in Pasadena, California. I have a view of palm trees and misty mountains and lots of green. It's a bit surreal. Last week, I suddenly got an opportunity to attend the Art Center Design Conference, which starts today. After reading the list of speakers, I jumped at the chance. Never mind that things at work seem to be imploding (it's been a week of Mondays) and I have deadlines I don't know how I'll make now that I'm missing three days of work. Never mind that I was in the middle of a home improvement project that has been put on hold because of this, or that I had to cancel plans with a friend who I've neglected too much lately anyway. I know that all those things will get done, even if they don't get done in the way I'd planned (I never knew I'd grow up to be such a control freak).
It feels weird to be doing things in the wrong order. Weird but sort of good, like when your muscles hurt from exercising, but not so badly that you know you've been injured.
Anyway. I've heard that some of the talks from this conference will be posted on the TED website. I'll link to them if and when I find out about that.
So sometime while I was in Ireland, one of my coworkers (hi, L!) found my Twitter name which obviously wasn't difficult because I used my standard email address in my Twitter account. It wouldn't take a rocket scientist to go from there to here because I put this URL in my Twitter account as well.
I was expecting said coworker (or one of several others who also use Twitter) to say something about this, but so far there has not been a comment. I suspect this has something to do with the fact that a different one of my coworkers found a previous website of mine years ago in kind of an odd way and it spooked me enough that it probably was one element in the later demise of that website.
Now, there is nothing inherently secretive about this website. I don't say anything here that I wouldn't say elsewhere. I haven't hidden it from friends or family or anyone. I just don't advertise it because for some reason I can't quite fathom, it embarrasses me. I get very self-conscious about it. Which seems like an impossible thing; after all, what's more public than a place where my every word will be cached and accessible even if I decided to delete it yet again? But it is what it is.
It's funny because another one of my coworkers has a blog she shares with her husband and she's totally cool about it. I read the blog and I talk about it with her on a weekly basis and it's just not a big deal. Yet in all the time that I've been reading her blog, I haven't even mentioned that I had one. If I were her, I'd think that was pretty odd, and a bit awkward.
It is what it is.
Well, instead of getting cold feet, I thought I'd just take a second to say hi to any coworkers who happen to come by here. Don't worry, coworkers, you can talk to me about my website. I probably won't have anything insightful to say about it because I really don't know why I have it. More than anything else, I think it's because part of my job is to make websites, and it would feel odd to not have one of my own. It's sort of comforting to know it's here and I can use this space to play around with anything I want. Even if I can never find the time for it, I like just knowing it's here.
He chases his tail vigorously, often spending several minutes just glaring at it, sighing and occasionally hissing in its direction.
The only way we can take him to the vet for his annual checkup is to give him a hefty dose of Acepromazine (aka, kitty tranq). This causes him to stumble around drunkenly purring, with his inner eyelids partway across his eyes. It's both heartbreaking and hilarious but, most importantly, it helps him to not scream bloody murder and soil himself in terror at the vet's office.
A bizarre side effect we've noticed in the several years we've been giving him this drug is that it seems to have a permanent effect on his mood. Each year after taking him to the vet, he's been noticeably less anxious when we've had friends or family over. His hissing and growling has diminished, not slowly over time but instead in stages, each time after a visit to the vet. Makes me wonder what he'd be like if we gave him this drug more often (an experiment that will not be carried out, thank you).
If we play with the laser pointer, he likes it at first but after a while he starts acting paranoid. Twitching and jerkily looking all around as though the SPIDERS! THEY'RE ALL OVER HIM! GET THEM OFF, GET THEM OFF! It takes him at least an hour to get over the jumpiness. We don't play with the laser pointer anymore.
He chews everything and excessively licks furniture and doors.
I'm quite sure Indy is beyond weird and is a mentally ill cat. But he's our mentally ill cat.
I think this weekend will be the pinnacle of spring in Minnesota. The temperature is in the 60s-70s, a few benign white clouds float by, trees are bursting with new leaves and blossoms, tulips and daffodils are everywhere. It is glorious. And I feel like there are so many good things to look forward to.
Next Wednesday is Brad's and my 3-year anniversary. We're going to the Happy Gnome, which I've been wanting to check out since they opened. We just bought tickets to see Spamalot when it's in town in two weeks. And in three weeks, my sister will be in town to visit, and there will be much celebration of birthdays, since lots of the birthdays in my family all stack up in May and June.
Speaking of which, my 30th birthday is in about a month. It's always exciting to hit a birthday milestone and I really don't mind the zero at all.
I just love this time of year and that optimistic feeling that always seems to come with it.
After quite a long hiatus, I'm starting anew with my photo-a-day project. Starting as of yesterday.
I'm also going to get all my Ireland photos up, by June 7th at the latest (June 7th because that's when my sister will be in town and we'll need to sit down and share photos and stories of our trips - me to Ireland and her to Prague).
Today I planted my container garden (I'll probably plant a few more next weekend, though) and went on my first real bike ride of the season. Have I mentioned yet how much I love spring? I'm waking up from hibernation.
We're finally getting the water damage inside our house repaired this week. This was from the storm we had last August, when golf ball-sized hail destroyed our roof. We got our new roof months ago, but it's taken AGES to get the water damage in the interior of the house taken care of. I suppose I shouldn't complain too much. It's all covered by insurance.
So I'm working from home today, ensconced in the basement with the cats. They were freaked out at first by all the sawing and hammering and footsteps and fumes coming from the upper level. Now they're just bickering like children and attempting to drape themselves on me whenever possible. You know, the usual.
It's so cold in our basement, I've had to dig out the winter weather gear. I'm actually quite cozy now. I feel sort of like I'm hanging out in a bomb shelter, what with the winter gear, the stores of foodstuffs I've stashed down here, and all the necessities. Am I the only one who went through a phase as a child where I thought it would be REALLY COOL to have to live in a bomb shelter for a while? Yeah, I thought so. I'm really weird.
